7 ways UI Students cook

Of the Greatest Nigerian students! Of the Greatest gbogbo! Great UITES, how we go take run this session? Food go dey? Abi na every man for himself?

Hello, my dear readers. How are you all doing? My fellow students, how are you? How is resumption preparation going? I am sure you are already packing provisions and pantries left, right, and center, abi no show?

Cooking for UITES comes in dynamic ways that depend on certain factors:  time, money, interest, and preference. Time availability will determine if you want to cook extravagantly or just do indomie sharply before that 7 am class. Money will decide if all those condiments and additives will be complete, abi na just sakala we go chop. Interest will determine if Jollof is the way or just munch on cereal (garri, most likely). Preference will determine whether you are eating sharwama as an omo butter or na just fried fish pie as paki wey you be (hehehe).

You should check this out: Foods UI Students Eat To Avoid SAPA

I’ll be taking you through 7 highlighted ways that UI students cook. Ways that are peculiar to UITES and are determined by certain factors. Come with me as we explore the ways of the UI students’ cuisine.

1. Rich Kid Style

# RichKid, this one is unique to dem odogwu and odogwu pikins.These students have all the money and time to do as they please. They are always in flex mode when it comes to cooking. They cook what they want, when they want it, and how they want it.

Talmbout stir-fry Spaghetti that has all the veggies and condiments, and is complete with a beautifully marinated chicken sitting pretty on the dish. Or is it Yam and Egg? And I don’t just mean Egg, but Egg with a generous addition of tomato, pepper, onion, and sardine. Rice and meat stew, nko? Minced meat in a red hot stew that looks too seggzy to eat with sweet Dodo on the side. Whose mouth is watering like mine right now?

The rich kid style has no constraints on money or time. Even if it is sharp indomie, the pantry is full of those sweet veggies that make indomie look sumptuous. Drinking garri for them sef get levels. Talmbout garri with sugar, correct milk (maybe Hollandia EVAP) with groundnut, and a side dish of rich suya or fried fish/meat.

#RichKid is the cuisine oppressor of UI.

2. Sapa Style

#Sapa is the stark opposite of #RichKid. Sapa cuisine style is typical of students who no too get like that. Their provision stack and pantry stash are empty and almost non-existent. They are the kinds of students who just source money to buy small pepper and shikini rice when they are starving.

What is stir-fry in #Sapa? Spaghetti with omi obe is the way, no egg, no fish, no nothing. This way is actually common for about 70% of the UI student population. And this season of Sapa way strikes towards and during the exam period for this 70%.

Indomie is boiled like that with shikini pepper and nothing because everything is graded on the management level. Veggies in Rice or Spaghetti are a big luxury in this cuisine style. Yam and Egg? Did you say Yam and Egg? What happened to Palm Oil or Vegetable Oil, hmm?

#Sapa is the cuisine oppression recipient of UI.

This will interest you: 5 Nigerian Meals you can prepare with 200 naira.

3. Na Concoction Sure Pass

Haven’t you heard? That concoction is the way!

This style is somewhat similar to the Sapa way. At this stage, the Sapa syndrome has hit hard already. At this stage, concoction is the order of the day: morning, afternoon, and night. Wait, did I just say that? My bad, I mean morning and night or afternoon and night or night only. This is the stage where the timetable of 1-0-1, 0-1-1, or 0-0-1 hits. And for each of the 1s, na concoction sure pass!

This concoction is just that—a concoction. Basically, rice and stew with vegetable oil shikena. Did you say Egg, Fish, or meat? No hunni. And the fastest way of cooking this is just to pour everything together, make everything done sharpaly.

Concoction is that stage when Sapa don hold you wella. Onto the next.

4. Once a Day

Once a Day is a stage where 1-0-0, 0-1-0, or 0-0-1 have come to stay. Sapa has come to reign at this stage.

The not-so-privileged students are the first victims, vulnerable to this style of cooking. Where any semblance of cooking is done just once a day, the rest of the day, whatever you see ni?

Is it that some serious cooking is done at this one time? Nope, not at all. Talmbout concoction with nothing on top, or maybe garri with just sugar, or maybe bread and Zobo (#HolyCommunion).

Life goes on anyways, as long as you bathe and shine with the right packaging. Fake flexing is still a thing (wink).

Read this too: 10 Foods University Of Ibadan Students Cannot Do Without

5. Communal Cooking

This is yet another way of keeping body and soul together in the UI cuisine matters. Cooking together where everyone brings in one thing or the other. Tunde can bring the rice, Sola will get the pepper, Sarah has Maggi, Bolu has salt, and Tola will buy the fish. Everybody is satisfied.

Communal cooking is actually a thing on the university campus. The two most prominent male hostels in the school, Nnamdi Azikwe Hall (Zik) and Independence Hall (Indy), have an event that is called the “Common Pot.” At the event, the student executives of the hostel gather resources to cook in one pot, and the food will be shared with all residents of the hall; even non-residents partake sometimes. The menu is usually beans or porridge.

Apart from Common Pot, UI students also invest in communal cooking among their group of friends or floor mates in the hall. Source the food from different people make everybody just chop.

Communal cooking actually fosters love among the individuals involved.

6. Division of Labour

Next on the list is the Division of Labour style. I will make Eba, you make the stew, and we’ll eat. This style is common in the hostels, the female hostel especially.

You do this, and I will handle that, make the rice, and I will provide stew; Bose will buy meat. This cooking method comes into play when UITES begin to have an uneven stock of provision and foodstuffs. There is garri but no money for pepper. I have rice but no dry pepper and no oil for the stew.

Sharpaly call your gees and share the work, and everyone is happy.

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7. Who Cooking Help?

This way of cooking is common among ballers, fake ballers, and strong Sapa victims.

The ballers don’t cook; they eat out whenever they want to. Their shakara inside the eatery or restaurant is top-notch. They eat what they want, how they want it. God abeg, I want to be a baller and not a mechanic.

The fake ballers also don’t cook and don’t have money to eat out, but they pretend they do. Na dem, you sabi dem. They go dey flex like say wahala no dey, but actually, there is fire on the mountain. These ones survive on the real ballers. They tag along to the eateries and eat there, hence why they are called the “fake ballers.”

The strongest Sapa victims are those who don’t have provision, cannot buy provision, and hence cannot cook. No be say dem no fit cook, they just cannot afford to cook. Their survival as UI students is always on God.

And that’s a wrap! I have taken you through a variety of different ways UI students cook. I hope you enjoyed yourself. So tell us which way is your way.

Hit our comment section ASAP and tell us what you think. Which way is constant for you? Which way do you wish you can flex? Talk to us, please!

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