Of the greatest gbogbo!

Greatest gbagba!

Great UITES!

How are we doing? Good, I hope. Happiness and celebrations are in order because soon, our lives will be put back in motion, and we’ll see the end of this dreadfully long break. Now in light of preparations for resumption, there is mental preparation, emotional preparation, physical preparation, and most importantly financial preparation.

Sapa, as we know, is the slang used in this Gen Z era for financial incapacitation, that is, being broke. As students, we are vulnerable and easy victims of this affliction. I’m sure you can relate to this, school resumes freshly so money dey, small time like this exam period reach but money don finish since the first month of the session; this is usually the story of the victims of Sapa. Of course, it can be due to other factors as well, but the bottom line is we have all fallen victim at one point or the other.

Great UITES! Resumption to school has to be different this time. We must wield all power available to us and fight against Sapa. “No to Sapa” should be our Mantra and nothing else. Can I get an Amen?

So, onto say make Sapa no hold us for neck and stomach, in this copy are highlighted 7 proven ways to beat Sapa. Flexing above Sapa is very possible, my people. Follow through with me on this copy and discover the magic in these tips. You know how it is believed that 7 is a perfect number and it means perfection, well, these 7 tips are perfection. Follow it and be wise. Apply these tips diligently and watch how well you flex above Sapa. Come with me as I teach you how to defeat Sapa. I have designed these 7 ways in a step-by-step format, so follow through.

1. Know your Money

I bet you are asking what I mean by “know your money,” right? Chilaka, I go explain. Know your money, know your allowance, know your money capacity as you dey enter school. It is quite paramount for you to understand your money volume. What is your allowance range? How much Popsi dey give you? How much Mumsi dey give you? And how much you dey earn by yourself? Calculate all these and round it all up that way, you know your money. 

Knowing your money doesn’t cover money you are hoping to be gifted or borrowed. It covers money that you know is a sure banker. No go dey think that babe wey dey owe you, abi that guy wey promise you 5k or that rich aunty you sha dey dm on a daily, nope. Think money that you know Popsi sends steady, money that Mumsi will add, and money that you go get from payday. Knowing your money is the crucial first step to knowing how to defeat Sapa and fight against it with any hope of you winning. On to the next.

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2. Create a Rigid Budget

Ah ha! You know your money; what’s next? Budget! Not just any budget, a rigid budget. Let me quickly explain a rigid and flexible budget. A rigid budget is a budget that is strict and is made with no loopholes or options for addition, subtraction, or multiplication. While a flexible budget is a malleable one that can be adjusted as much as you want, it allows for addition, subtraction, and all of that. For this battle against Sapa, we are working with a rigid budget. 

Create your budget based solely on priority. Your expenses should follow the order of “which is more important?” Know your needs and know your wants, then create based on priority. Inside UI, food is a need; to dey jack on top empty stomach no wise at all, so note that. Attending a block party in Bodija is a want, know wetin you dey do. My darling, create a rigid budget, and you are well on your way to beating Sapa’s arse.

3. Stick strictly to your Budget

Now you have your rigid budget; the effort now is to stick strictly (emphasis on strictly) to that budget. This one isn’t particularly easy, but you have to. It’s all for the better, trust me. Your calculated expenses should remain just that, don’t sneak in an additional one, and don’t cheat your budget; you would only be shooting yourself in the leg. 

Sticking to your budget entails no impulsive buying, no unnecessary spending, and staying 100% faithful to your budget. Treat that budget like that your babe you love, that way you won’t cheat on it. Plenty things dey UI wey dey enter man eye, but man gats maintain focus no go loose guard, and you go dey alright. However, you might be wondering, what if an emergency that passes my budget arises? Chillax, I gat you… read on!

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4. Milk La Familia

Remember that I said I gat you? Chillax. We are students in the University, we are adults, and we should start taking responsibility for ourselves, this and that, yes we know, but all in all na pikin we still be, abi? Na Popsi and Mumsi dem still dey pay school fees. We are still the darlings of our rich aunties and the pride of our odogwu uncles. Dear UITES, maximize this opportunity

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I implore you to milk La Familia. So far, you are not married, you no get belle, and you no give pesin belle; you have the license to make requests. Cast away all pride and milk as much and as responsibly as you possibly can. Milk with sense but sha milk. Dem Aunty Bimpe, Uncle Kola, Daddy Tope, and Mummy Funke are there for you. But remember milk with sense, make you no go cast yourself. Now, what do you do with all that awoof money?… Next.

5. Save for the rainy day

You save! Savings are life savers (hey, that kinda rhymed), and they come to the rescue at your lowest moments. All that milking you have done, all that awoof money does not go into your rigid budget; it goes into your piggy bank. The most important way to beat Sapa is for you to have a secret emergency stash that is full and ready to go in case of incasity. Remember that I said I gat you? All your milking, all your awoof money, all your surprise money goes to that emergency stash. 

This is going to be really hard and tempting because free cash is the sweetest thing to squander, but remember that our goal is to defeat Sapa and flex above Sapa. Save that awoof money; it will come in handy when you need to shoot Sapa in the face of challenges. You have a rigid budget that you are working with and an estimate that you believe should cover all you need, but life doesn’t always go as planned and that is where your savings come to the rescue. As a UITE myself, I charge you, my fellow comrades, to save for the rainy day. It is a sure banker in your fight against Sapa.

6. Flex with Sense

You want to bam bah; you wanna chill with the big boys, now you dey run kiti kiti you dey run kata kata you no fit drink water drop cup… May this not be your story o. However, it will be your story if you do not flex with sense. On your budget, you have included the share of your money that is dedicated to flex, yes? Do not exceed the budget. 

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The University of Ibadan is a land filled with enticing flex opportunities that can make a focused person lose guard, but we will not allow it, yes? We will not o. My advice to you is that, in all thy flexings, flex with sense, flex according to your budget, flex without shooting yourself in the leg. In this new session, my dear, it’s not every party you go turn up; it’s not every shopping spree you tag along (except if you are just escorting or doing window shopping). Again I say flex with sense, my darling. Omo UI sora fun over flexing o, oluwa a wa pelu e.

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7. No dey do pass yourself

Finally, the last step. This step is the long and short, head and tail of all my shouting since morning. No dey do pass yourself. Cut your money according to your pocket; how? Avoid unnecessary billing from people wey no go see you when you are broke, avoid being a people pleaser, and fight against peer pressure. 

Try as much as possible not to overstep your boundaries and put your foot down when necessary. Na palm oil hand, people go help you lick o be blood hand; a word is enough for the wise.

Voila! We have come to the end of this exciting knowledgeable journey on how to defeat Sapa and ultimately nip it in the bud in the coming session(s). 

Dear reader, I hope you have learned a thing or two; I hereby implore you to please apply all the given tips and watch how you flex like mad on top Sapa matter. Sapa sef go sabi say you no be him mate. Cheers to flexing above Sapa.

Hit the comment section with your thoughts, additions, subtractions, and all. Which tip stood out to you the most? Which one has never worked for you? Which one do you think will work best for you once you implement it? Talk! Talk!! Talk!!!

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