I Was About To Break Up But He Popped The Question

The love of men, they say, is the root of all evils. Sorry, I meant the love of money. You get the gist na. Who doesn’t want luxury baecations from a tall glass of chocolate-y hunk? Steady weekend getaways courtesy of a chiselled Greek god? Please, I’m in! But let’s not aim too high, ehn? A happy life and our love languages should be enough.

Where should I start from? Okay…

It was a scorchingly hot day and I was dragging my feet on the equally scorchingly hot pavement, to my boyfriend’s house. Before I continue, meet me —a very hopeless romantic who loves good things. When I say good things, I mean things like delicious food, decent shelter, nice clothes, and hot sex. Call me materialistic but in case you do not know, we all are. Though most people are too stuck up to admit this nagging fact.

Maybe it was the sun baptizing me in rays of prickly heat or the thought of the distance I still had left to trek to this boy’s house, but I started reminiscing. Memories washed over me as I smiled fondly.

I hated him from the moment we met; Who steps on you without apologizing or feeling an iota of remorse? I showed him hell that day. I showered weighty insults on him and regarded him with visible disgust without having a clue that we’d be lovers. He later told me he loved my feistiness and willingness to speak up when I’m wronged. Our relationship was sweet but epileptic like NEPA light. Consequently, we broke up because of trivial issues a lot and it became unhealthy. Toxic, even.

However, it’s a different feeling when we are together. The moments we shared were filled with genuine smiles and happiness, on my part at least. Even though he claimed he loved me as I did him, he was never able to convince me. His smiles appeared to me as halfhearted and specious, he never bought me gifts, even though I got him little gifts from time to time, and his attempts to assure me of his true feelings are half-baked.

Of course, I expressed my dissatisfaction and he apologized and assured me he would change. Truly, I noticed little changes but I was already having doubts. He became a lot more vocal about his feelings and showed that he thought of me as much as I thought of him. Presently, what I do not understand is the reason I’m on my way to his house, in this intense weather, to call it quits. Man is changing! He is, but I feel I’m not getting the happiness I truly deserve. I love him and I know he does too in his way. Nevertheless, as long as I feel this way, synergy and intimacy will eventually dwindle. So, I have to be strong and make this tough, life-changing decision.

I got to the house and what I saw was not what I was expecting in any sense. There were flowers everywhere, sweet-smelling scented candles were burning dimly and I got a whiff of the aroma of food. I had to check my surroundings to be sure I entered the right house. Then, he came out and got on one knee and I could swear my heart stopped.

“Babe, I know things have been a bit rough between us and I appreciate your love and patience all these while. I do not take it for granted. I promise to be the man of your dreams and cherish you till the day I die if  you do me the honour of being my wife.”

My legs were rooted to the floor and I was as stoic as a statue. It felt as if my tongue already melted in my mouth. After a few agonizing moments that felt like forever, I turned on my heels and ran. Out of his house and his life. He kept calling me but I haven’t picked up his calls even once. I do not know what to say to him anymore. I’m in a dilemma. I need advice because I’m scared for my future. Someone help!


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