Breaking Free from the Past: Overcoming Trauma and Embracing Love – The Story of Oludayo Precious

I have never been one to have a knack for the opposite gender. They don’t excite me, I even dreaded their touch. Well, my name is Oludayo Precious and I’m in my late 20s, very, very ripe for marriage as you can see but yet to have a spouse. Arggh!!, how can I have a spouse when I can barely grace their presence talkless physical touch,😣😞 I told my therapist and she sighed. Now that’s a lot, she replied. Of course, I muttered. She then proceeded to ask if there was an instance or period in time when I got raped🤨 and I told her NO. I mean, if that was the case it would have been better in the sense that I will know why this was happening to me but it wasn’t. My session with her was almost over and she told me to think deep, probably it might be domestic violence, witness to murder or anything that might be related to my past. Something that could ave triggered me psychologically to breed my hate for men.

Few minutes later, I got home and met my mom. Damn, she’ll surely nag me again, I thought aloud.

How did the date go?😒

Is he handsome?🙄

It’s certain he’ll propose right?😒😒

Oh, he must have been smitten by your beauty, mhmm yes, I know that.😶

I was gobsmacked, you’d sense by now my mom was being sarcastic with her questions, lol, my sweet mom.🤭😚

I didn’t go on a date mom, I had an appointment with my therapist. Are we still on this?, she asked. I don’t know why I can’t tolerate them ,😔😔 I’m almost 30 and still don’t have a man.🤒 Why does it have to be so hard?. Do I really need to get married?. Shush, why did your therapist say? She asked and I explained how the session went. So, the cause of all this might be a traumatic event you experienced?. Yes, I said.

Are you sure you don’t know why all this is happening? Or you just choose to be ignorant. What do  you mean mother? I asked her.🤷🏽

Precious, oh my precious daughter, calm down now. It’s all in past anyway, my mom said. But he damaged us, he…..he….he, I stuttered, he almost killed you, US. I started shaking and had a flashback to when my father would beat up my mom and when I tried  to draw him away, he’d punch me all over. I couldn’t let any man near me after that. I can’t.Your Father, she responded. A tear escaped my eyes as she said it. Father? FATHER? My Father?. That man was no father, he was a beast and he deserved his death. His suffering shall continue, even in hell,I shouted.


Is that why you hate them? She asked me. They….., men are…., I struggled to form a sentence and then I realized, I was traumatized by my father acts and other men didn’t do anything to me.🙍🏽‍♀️

Your father is the reason why you hate men and can’t stand their touch. You fear you may end up with someone like your father and that could may you reason you are a failure, but no my child. You are different and not me. Your principles and all you stand for won’t let that happen. First, you have to forgive your father and let go of the past. Move one, life dies but center around the past.

Wow, I said, amazed by my mother’s words. I was comforted by what she said and promised to give my father and make peace with myself. I didn’t give much thought to the fact that my past traumatized me but my mom made me realize that.

I can’t imagine I paid an exorbitant price for a therapist when I have one at home.

Oh…..hahahaha, we had a hearty laugh at that. Thank you mom, I told her sincerely.

Should I be expecting a suitor soon?👀

Mom!!!, What?, okay okay. Typical African mothers, I laughed. Ha, I sighed, at last I got this off my chest, no more trauma.😊

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